Friday, May 21, 2010

An Intellectual Hiatus

(In which I wonder why I am so uncoordinated lately.)


Way back in college, I was used to handling class reports when the reporters were either unprepared or absent. And even to my own surprise, I was able to share facts (as well as my own profound opinion) fluently. It was as if all the thoughts from my head flowed straight to my mouth and my lips and tongue presented the words in an incredibly smart fashion.

Contemplating on what I’ve become now only fills me with utmost bewilderment. What happened?!

I tend to forget complex words that I’ve already encountered.

I stutter stupidly.

I’ve got no idea where my next sentence will be coming from.

Sounds like a severe abnormality? It sure does to me. But I don’t see any reason to be like this. My job’s totally not a no-brainer. (Teaching English grammar and writing isn’t a no-brainer!) I read. (That’s obvious unless it’s the first time you have read my writings.) And I write (Unless you haven’t heard – or I haven’t told you – I’m blogging!) so why in the world is my brain – or rather my mouth – is acting stupidly? Is it the food I eat? Wait, I’ve been eating better since I got a job! And I’ve got a job for almost two years now! Although I cannot assure you that my diet is the kind of diet that nutritionists will approve of, they’re not always fast food.

(Contemplates once more.)

To at least have a better idea as to what led me towards this terrible situation, (other than the idea that I’m just a plain stupid fella) let’s apply the rule of thumb – i.e., to backtrack.

(Contemplates some more.)

When I first started working, I speak terribly fast and my questions were more often inferential than literal that I am a frequent visitor in the Manager’s Office. Apparently, my students complained that they were having a hard time catching up to my speed let alone answering my questions. So I compromised. I slowed down my speech to 80% then had another meeting with the manager and dropped it down to an incredibly low speed of 60%. But wait there’s more! I cut out the profound and scholarly way of asking questions and came out with “What did you do yesterday?” “What’s the cat doing?” and “In your opinion, what caused the characters to do those things?” Wait. That’s complex. Let’s rephrase. “Why did they do that?”

Whoah! Wait! Put your eyebrows down! I’m not saying that these people are nitwits. Most of them even have higher IQs that I do. (But that’s another story.) What I’m saying is perhaps I got too comfortable simplifying things that I stopped practicing what I learned. Another thing, have I told you I’m asocial? Then perhaps I need to enhance my socializing skills (if there is any) or maybe I should stop talking to myself (from within) and start talking to myself aloud. Just kidding.